Tuesday, December 18, 2012

Change...(aka: Where the Heck Have I Been?)

I'm sure I don't have to tell you: life changes. Even when that change is a good thing, it can be a challenge. I can't say it's a surprise that my almost-five-year old is growing up; she has been doing it since she was born, after all. Yet, somehow in the course of the last year I've gone from the "mommy" of a toddler to the "mom" of a kid- a very active, smart, inquisitive kid. At the same time, my incredibly career-driven (read: workaholic) partner Brad has been promoted at work, affording him less time at home and making the time he does have with us all the more precious.

Both of those life events mirror what has happened to this very site; it has grown continually since it's inception, and in a way, has been "promoted" from a hobby to a job. I realized this a while ago, and along with that realization came the stress of knowing that this wasn't something I was just doing for fun anymore.

Now, don't get me wrong. This site, and my work as a makeup artist and skincare enthusiast, is a passion for me. Writing is something I truly need to do to remain sane; I've been a story-teller my entire life. At age 9 I got a typewriter for Christmas and, like I'm sure any pre-teen would, immediately started writing my first novel. The time I spent on my high school newspaper was some of the most fulfilling of my school years; I even considered majoring in journalism in college. Life intervened though, and I went off in another direction (or so I thought). When it dawned on me, somewhat recently, that I actually am a writer, it was like finding a path in the woods that I'd long thought lost. As it turns out, it was just overgrown. So, yes, Out In A Pout has shifted from a pastime to a responsibility, but it's a responsibility I welcome. With that acceptance came the realization that I need to reorganize.

My lovely fiancĂ© told me the other day that I'm like a butterfly. No, he wasn't speaking of my beauty and fragility- it was his way of pointing out that I can be a bit chaotic. I flutter around from one flower to the next, sometimes without heed to where I'm going, how long it might take, or even what I'll do when I get there. The man knows me well, and I can't say he's the only person to observe this over the years. Ask my mother how many times as a kid I was sent in to clean my room, only to be found an hour later meticulously organizing my sock drawer in an otherwise only mildly-improved room. Those of you who have been visiting for a while will have noticed this pattern in my writing. For me, the details are my adventure, and I have no problem taking my time to reach my end point.

And what is that end-point? Well, I have several that I know of already, and no doubt several more that have yet to occur to me. I created this website to share my years of experience, as a creative outlet and a mental exercise. I'm incredibly proud of what it has become over the last few years- the partnerships I've made and the trust instilled in me by you: my dear readers and friends.

Earlier, I mentioned reorganizing. This is something that I've been wanting to do on every level of my life for a long time, and over the coming months, I hope to get my brain centered to a place that lets me nurture and enjoy my family and home, while continuing to grow this site and give you all more of what you've come to expect when you stop by. The change won't happen overnight, and since most of it will be behind-the-scenes, it might not look like much at all at first, so I ask for your patience. Thanks to everyone out there reading this, for your friendship and support, and here's to change!

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